Confessions of a Misfit

44_gp

There was once a priest who told her that wherever she goes and whatever she joins, she will never belong.She will always be different. Her ideas and ideals will always be different from the people around her. That is maybe one of the reasons why she can only keep a few friends and not that many. That is maybe one of the reasons why she’d rather keep things to herself and not share a word with anyone. Although she opens too easily and trusts too easily, she does not want to bother people with her useless emotions. But she also does not care if the people she trusts stabs her back. She is a misfit, after all. She brags about helping people in any way she can. She brags about being cool with whatever people do to her. Although inside her she’s happy yet a little disappointed. She knows that nothing is temporary and that everybody disappears, the only difference is the speed levels.

Being a misfit fits her well, she says. She ain’t that comfortable with people and how most individuals think. She brings about a dozen ideas for one person who has goals. It depends on the person if he or she will take her advice or if he or she will just take advantage of her. Either way, she does not care as she does not belong. Someone says she’s too willing and committed to too many groups of people. She was forced to choose only one, and yes she chose. But inside her, she wants to explode. “Why am I forced to choose when there is no need for it? Why do I need to choose even though I know I won’t belong to anything or anyone? Why do I have to utter words that I know I will regret? Why do I have to face them with a cheerful smile when I’m screaming and crying so loud inside?

“Why am I forced to choose when there is no need for it? Why do I need to choose even though I know I won’t belong to anything or anyone? Why do I have to utter words that I know I will regret? Why do I have to face them with a cheerful smile when I’m screaming and crying so loud inside? Is this how it feels to deal with a lot of different people? Is this how painful it is to be with those who struggle and plays a tug-of-war in reality?”

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s