#WeekendCoffeeShare: Get Dizzy On This One

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I am recently overwhelmed, that tears are starting to form right about now if I don’t stop talking about it. Okay.
I’m heading to Manila tonight. To accompany my sister and meet with dad. But before that…recap.

So I was a day late with reality. I thought it’s still Friday. But yesterday, I rejected someone’s invitation because I already accepted and scheduled my day for someone else. Although I can make two appointments a day, I did not because it was my first time hanging out with someone who I think is neutral and is in an organization that caught my attention. My adventurous side was poked once again.

I tagged along without knowing if that person really wanted me to come with him. We talked about almost everything and I think that my facial expressions are too showy, again, like, my words does not sync with my facial expressions. Why am I so expressive with my mouth and eyes?! Urgh! Anyways, I got conscious cause yeah that person caught me by the face, I guess.

We ate fishcakes! Cause that person does not now what they are, and also Ramen! Bahaha! So we ate what I have been craving for weeks now. Though I have eaten these consistently, it’s always a different experience. hahaha! We were rushing to go home but not really and then we talked more. I mean, that person talked about his experiences a lot. I loved it. I loved it when all I have to do is listen. I guess my weakness comes from being asked about my feelings as of the moment so it was good that that did not come out in any way. I was just so happy and excited!

I suddenly remembered kuya Tor, an artist who told me one time: ” Wow, you really meet people who loves to talk and tell stories huh”, and when I think about it, he was right. I always have this special connection with people who loves to talk. That am happy about.

And then grandma gets confined again. Back to the hospital and my thoughts on hospital related stories. Mom told me to go and look after her. So I decided to bring my volks and weather it tonight. At the hospital. After buying dinner and right before eating eat, mom says ” let your aunt eat that cause you’re going to Manila tonight”. Say what now?! So here I am, preparing for a trip that I don’t even know what’s gonna happen.

But, in between these events, a heavy heart lurks inside. Mad and overwhelmed, I don’t really have any idea what to do or how to deal with difficult people. Yes, I know I have to understand where they’re coming from and all, but this is too much. Why bother talking to me when you know deep inside you, you’re doubting me and that you just want to bombard my life like am easy as pie?! Strange as it is, I feel empty. I feel like am still in chains and you’re holding me by the neck. This is why am undecided as to what to do with Facebook. Deactivate or not? If I do, how about the people who sincerely wants to talk to me? But yes, deactivate for the whole month, April. Just because it’s my birth month! haha!

So if we were having coffee, I might be crying while laughing right now. Because I am sad as well as excited. And you might think am crazy and yes you may even call me “The Drama Queen”. 😀

Bully, Jokes, and a Little Bit Truths

I’ll come back here and post some nitty gritty cheesy lines. Haha

Ran errands for mom, listened to Mozart for the whole day. I was supposed to meet Yumi the dog, but the text message got lost somewhere. Then I walked to town again. I ordered a chicken sandwich at McDonald’s just so I won’t get kicked out. haha. Tired.

I forgot to go have my toenails pedicured. Amf. Hahaha

I’m bored. I don’t have anything or anyone to annoy. So I just called out for someone who I now will bully me but at least I could bully too. hahaha! Kuya Gee brought me sand bags for my tank. Then I tagged along to annoy him and be noisy as I can be. This boredom is killing me. I laughed out loud and jumped liked a kid. I called him “Balong” too loud for anyone to hear just because. I enjoyed his company. He satisfies my thirst for annoying people to the max. I can’t do that with others. They’re too serious to piss off. They’re too straight and takes things like it’s a matter of life and death. And I don’t like that. Cause I take everything as a joke. I make everything as a joke. I know, I know, I have my limits too. Boundaries I should not cross or am the one who’ll end up as the laughing stock. But that’s okay too. I guess am used to it? bahahaha.
Kuya Gee visited our home. To check up on my works in progress. Whew. I was glad he came. I got so many mistakes on my figures. He asked if I watch Youtube tutorials. No. I am tempted to sleep while watching Youtube tutorials. Maybe that’s why am slow at learning with these german figures. lol. So he let me watch some tutorials, scolded me for my mistakes, and taught me what I lack. For now. Then he made me walk from our house to RFQ where we usually buy paints and thinners. Dreadful and I know it’s his way of bullying too but that’s okay. Then went home.

When fishcakes rule my world. I crave every time I see one. So let me just have some okay? Say like 5 to 10 sticks would do, yeah? 😉

I am so tired. So exhausted. But so excited to continue the figures cause I learned something new. But am not gonna post some photos. I’m shy. Look at it when it’s almost done. haha.
Took a nap at night. I woke up at 12:14am, thinking I should go build. But fear of the dark takes over once again. Instead I listened to Mozart and typed. With mixed emotions because of social media chatting and all, I could not go back to sleep. haha. I’m thrilled and excited. Saying a bit of the truth then says it’s a joke then change the change subject and say another piece of truth. haha. The merry-go-round of words is amazing as it gets.

P.S. I’ve been rambling that mauch lately? Sorry. Too much mixed emotions.

The Day I Talked to People The Most

So I called this day “The Day I Talked to People The Most”. Because I had a meeting with SM. Because I had an opportunity for me and my artist friends. Because I talked to an artist who knows about business too. Because I went home and came back to town to meet with an artist who thinks clearly and speaks calmly about things and situations. Because finally, things are clearing up for me. Because I went to a hobby shop to find solace and I found it and got even more. Because while knowing that other people are facing some kind of chaos, I was everywhere thinking of how to improve one’s life by just being there for them. I could say that I am tired and exhausted, but I feel so happy that ideas and things pop up into my head so fast that I need and I really really have to talk to someone who needs some piece of talk. Any kind of talk for that matter.
Because while knowing that other people are facing some kind of chaos, I was everywhere thinking of how to improve one’s life by just being there for them. I could say that I am tired and exhausted, but I feel so happy that ideas and things pop up into my head so fast that I need and I really really have to talk to someone who needs some piece of talk. Any kind of talk for that matter. Because this brain needs something to work on. The more problems, the better. The harder the conversation is, the better. I love debating about things and ideas. I love pointing out how correct you are or how right I am.

I talked to 12 people today. For an anti-social (joke) like me, that’s too much. I normally talk to 3 people at most for a day. Two is okay, three would make me lazy at home, 4 would make me keep my phone in silent mode so I won’t be tempted to check notifications. 5 would exhaust me and 7 would drain me totally. So what will 12 individuals do to me then? Hyper Mode, maybe. Ha ha ha!

Stroll

image

“Come stroll with me in my mind. Come stroll with me here, dear.” He said, smiling and offering his hand.

“You’re funny. You are too far away. How will I ever get there? Will you be paying for my fare?” She giggled.

“Of course not. I’ll come home and we’ll swim together going back here.” He joked.

She laughed then, her uncontrollable laugh she has been hiding.

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Today’s post and a stroll around for other blog posts…

a stroll through the dark

a not so lazy sunday afternoon because it is sunday, right?