#WeekendCoffeeShare: Get Dizzy On This One

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I am recently overwhelmed, that tears are starting to form right about now if I don’t stop talking about it. Okay.
I’m heading to Manila tonight. To accompany my sister and meet with dad. But before that…recap.

So I was a day late with reality. I thought it’s still Friday. But yesterday, I rejected someone’s invitation because I already accepted and scheduled my day for someone else. Although I can make two appointments a day, I did not because it was my first time hanging out with someone who I think is neutral and is in an organization that caught my attention. My adventurous side was poked once again.

I tagged along without knowing if that person really wanted me to come with him. We talked about almost everything and I think that my facial expressions are too showy, again, like, my words does not sync with my facial expressions. Why am I so expressive with my mouth and eyes?! Urgh! Anyways, I got conscious cause yeah that person caught me by the face, I guess.

We ate fishcakes! Cause that person does not now what they are, and also Ramen! Bahaha! So we ate what I have been craving for weeks now. Though I have eaten these consistently, it’s always a different experience. hahaha! We were rushing to go home but not really and then we talked more. I mean, that person talked about his experiences a lot. I loved it. I loved it when all I have to do is listen. I guess my weakness comes from being asked about my feelings as of the moment so it was good that that did not come out in any way. I was just so happy and excited!

I suddenly remembered kuya Tor, an artist who told me one time: ” Wow, you really meet people who loves to talk and tell stories huh”, and when I think about it, he was right. I always have this special connection with people who loves to talk. That am happy about.

And then grandma gets confined again. Back to the hospital and my thoughts on hospital related stories. Mom told me to go and look after her. So I decided to bring my volks and weather it tonight. At the hospital. After buying dinner and right before eating eat, mom says ” let your aunt eat that cause you’re going to Manila tonight”. Say what now?! So here I am, preparing for a trip that I don’t even know what’s gonna happen.

But, in between these events, a heavy heart lurks inside. Mad and overwhelmed, I don’t really have any idea what to do or how to deal with difficult people. Yes, I know I have to understand where they’re coming from and all, but this is too much. Why bother talking to me when you know deep inside you, you’re doubting me and that you just want to bombard my life like am easy as pie?! Strange as it is, I feel empty. I feel like am still in chains and you’re holding me by the neck. This is why am undecided as to what to do with Facebook. Deactivate or not? If I do, how about the people who sincerely wants to talk to me? But yes, deactivate for the whole month, April. Just because it’s my birth month! haha!

So if we were having coffee, I might be crying while laughing right now. Because I am sad as well as excited. And you might think am crazy and yes you may even call me “The Drama Queen”. ūüėÄ

#WeekendCoffeeShare

If we were having coffee, am sure as hell that I’d be silent outside and screaming inside. My mind is in chaos with these mixed up emotions building. One heavy circumstance after another and am not even given a time to let things sink in. Wow.
But I’ll ask you how you are, how your day went, and I want every detail of it. It does not matter whether it is boring or not as long as I know what have you been up to. Cause that is how curious I am to your whereabouts. Because I love listening to you and your voice. Because I know that sometimes, even if you don’t say it, you want someone to listen to you. Because there are also times that I want a diversion, a way to suppress my own thoughts by knowing someone’s day.

So if I say your name or call out to you or just send a smiley, that means I want you to talk to me, to tell me anything. Just because. I wish you’d know how much I care for one person as much as I care for all the people I meet along the way.

If we were having coffee right now, can you imagine? We’re at some sidewalk caf√©, sipping some not-so-hard coffee drink and laughing out loud like there’s no tomorrow. Our crazy adventures collide, our thoughts go in parallel paths as we think alike. We even have thoughts on drinking beer or something hard but we don’t cause we just…don’t. It’s like a mutual understanding that we save those beer or liquor moments for that special day, where we are celebrating something big. And we don’t have to say anything about it cause we already know it by heart.

So…how are you? How’s life lately? How have you been treating your days when we weren’t together? I am sure that you are having your own best-day-of-your-life moments from time to time. And I also know that you’re dying to share them, so call me and I’ll be there to listen. I am excited!

Weekend Coffee Share

 

If we were having coffee right now, I’d tell you that I am happy, overwhelmed, and confused. Life is great lately mainly because of the shock-surprise I got from Jam, IPMS Secretary. I’ll be doing something big soon. Yes, this something is big for me even though it would not mean that much for you. I’ll be doing a…nah, not now. Anyways. Aside from that, I have been writing drafts for the artist’s writeups which will be posted on Blissful Pages soon. What makes me happy is the overflowing of words inside me right now. My mind is going to explode soon so I have to finish and wrap things up with what the artists want me to write before I go haywire. Next week will be a very busy week for me. I’ll be working in the Baguio Country Club Library! Alone! Mostly alone. Ha ha. I honestly do not know if I can do this or not but hey, it’s worth a shot. Jam’s words are still in my mind…

 This is a break for you! We are just here to support you. I am here to make sure everything will succeed. 

Teary-eyed me. Yeah you can say it’s overreacting for me. But hey, this is the biggest thing ever! And what more, it’s what I was imagining like two months ago. I wanted to do something big but I don’t know how to start. And then I scribbled a project for the local artists that I am planning to make it my long-term goal and then I got sidetracked along the way. But it’s the same banana, bonita!

Everything is overwhelming that I got my week fully scheduled. Fully booked? Ha ha. Yeah. Meeting people here and there, getting ideas from left to right. Because next week, I won’t be publicly seen with anyone and I won’t be around asking for lunch buddies or joy companions. Ha ha.

Confusion. Quite confused with people lately. I guess being my true self even for a day is dangerous. I guess, bringing out the “me” of yesteryears is scary. Because of the good news, I suddenly had the courage to be myself (the real me) and then I regret it right on. Now, I guess I don’t have the strength to be anything anymore. Back to being the boring me as of the moment.

*paging amateurairplanes to contact me. hahaha. *

Stairway

stairway

It seems so far away, the end of the stairway that we’re all climbing. It seems so distant that we often give up or rest for a while before continuing. There are even times when we thought we’ve reached the peak only to find out we still have a long way to go. We get disappointed. We get drained out of energy. We get lost at times. We pout and we cry. We stumble and get tired of continuing.

But I want to tell you that…never ever give up. Even when you’re out of breath. Even when you’re bruised and your knees are shaking. Even when you’re starving and hopeless.

Because that stairway has no end, actually. It is a continuous pathway and it was made for us to walk through. It does not really end unless you make it. It does not really end unless you’re 6 feet below the ground. It does not really end in the ways we expect it to. So why¬†do you have to bother giving up when all you could do is enjoy the journey while it is still there. The only trick is to walk slowly and observe your surroundings. In observation, it is where we meet the people we have in our lives today. In observation, it is where we could truly see the purpose of the stairway that was uniquely made for us.

P.S.

I hope this inspired you!

And so, my favorites from today’s prompt

the stairway of love, are you ready to take it?

love much?

take the stairs, it’s the most adventurous¬†thing!

life is like a stairway

an old woman ni a booktower

have you seen the world’s most colourful stairway¬†?

feline stairs

looking down, i see you struggling and i laugh! haha