#WeekendCoffeeShare

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that these past days were a fairy tale–a dream to which I never plan to wake from but forced to. Dad visiting for my birthday is I guess the best thing ever. I mean, yeah, of course it is a “best thing ever” if it is a marriage he’s visiting, but it’s different when he’s happy and all.
If we were having coffee, I’d be crying right now as I am telling you that I do not want to wake from my dream of having dad and mom together with holding hands and who obviously–according to what I can see and hear–are madly in love with each other. My heart is racing. My mind is battling with my every word. I wanted to go there, here, everywhere. I wanted to do this, that, and everything. I want to do everything at once, and to be everywhere at the same time. Because I know that time is fleeting and I know that all of this is temporary.

If we were having coffee, you’d be laughing at me or your brows are curled up while listening to my rants and ramblings. You might even want to go away from me right now because you’d be hearing secrets and stories and it’d be too much to handle because at some point I am telling you a whole story book and suddenly I am telling you about a new book entirely. The shifting of topics and the mixture of emotions afloat, you’d go crazy over them and you’d wish to vanish right this moment–if it does not excite you in any way, that it.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that The Secret exists and that as Paulo Coelho says, “If you want something, the universe conspires to help you achieve it.” Because I wished for a simple celebration on my birthday. Because I got what I wanted which is to have dad see mom and my kids as happy as they should be to spend time with their grandfather.

If we were having coffee, we’d be on our 3rd refill already. We’d both be laughing at how absurd and crazy my life has been since I was a kid. But then I’d stop and look outside to realize that it’s already late, the clock struck midnight, and Cinderella’s got to go. So I finish our little coffee time with some more fascinating experiences to tell for our “Next Time”.

#WeekendCoffeeShare: Get Dizzy On This One

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I am recently overwhelmed, that tears are starting to form right about now if I don’t stop talking about it. Okay.
I’m heading to Manila tonight. To accompany my sister and meet with dad. But before that…recap.

So I was a day late with reality. I thought it’s still Friday. But yesterday, I rejected someone’s invitation because I already accepted and scheduled my day for someone else. Although I can make two appointments a day, I did not because it was my first time hanging out with someone who I think is neutral and is in an organization that caught my attention. My adventurous side was poked once again.

I tagged along without knowing if that person really wanted me to come with him. We talked about almost everything and I think that my facial expressions are too showy, again, like, my words does not sync with my facial expressions. Why am I so expressive with my mouth and eyes?! Urgh! Anyways, I got conscious cause yeah that person caught me by the face, I guess.

We ate fishcakes! Cause that person does not now what they are, and also Ramen! Bahaha! So we ate what I have been craving for weeks now. Though I have eaten these consistently, it’s always a different experience. hahaha! We were rushing to go home but not really and then we talked more. I mean, that person talked about his experiences a lot. I loved it. I loved it when all I have to do is listen. I guess my weakness comes from being asked about my feelings as of the moment so it was good that that did not come out in any way. I was just so happy and excited!

I suddenly remembered kuya Tor, an artist who told me one time: ” Wow, you really meet people who loves to talk and tell stories huh”, and when I think about it, he was right. I always have this special connection with people who loves to talk. That am happy about.

And then grandma gets confined again. Back to the hospital and my thoughts on hospital related stories. Mom told me to go and look after her. So I decided to bring my volks and weather it tonight. At the hospital. After buying dinner and right before eating eat, mom says ” let your aunt eat that cause you’re going to Manila tonight”. Say what now?! So here I am, preparing for a trip that I don’t even know what’s gonna happen.

But, in between these events, a heavy heart lurks inside. Mad and overwhelmed, I don’t really have any idea what to do or how to deal with difficult people. Yes, I know I have to understand where they’re coming from and all, but this is too much. Why bother talking to me when you know deep inside you, you’re doubting me and that you just want to bombard my life like am easy as pie?! Strange as it is, I feel empty. I feel like am still in chains and you’re holding me by the neck. This is why am undecided as to what to do with Facebook. Deactivate or not? If I do, how about the people who sincerely wants to talk to me? But yes, deactivate for the whole month, April. Just because it’s my birth month! haha!

So if we were having coffee, I might be crying while laughing right now. Because I am sad as well as excited. And you might think am crazy and yes you may even call me “The Drama Queen”. 😀

#WeekendCoffeeShare

If we were having coffee, am sure as hell that I’d be silent outside and screaming inside. My mind is in chaos with these mixed up emotions building. One heavy circumstance after another and am not even given a time to let things sink in. Wow.
But I’ll ask you how you are, how your day went, and I want every detail of it. It does not matter whether it is boring or not as long as I know what have you been up to. Cause that is how curious I am to your whereabouts. Because I love listening to you and your voice. Because I know that sometimes, even if you don’t say it, you want someone to listen to you. Because there are also times that I want a diversion, a way to suppress my own thoughts by knowing someone’s day.

So if I say your name or call out to you or just send a smiley, that means I want you to talk to me, to tell me anything. Just because. I wish you’d know how much I care for one person as much as I care for all the people I meet along the way.

If we were having coffee right now, can you imagine? We’re at some sidewalk café, sipping some not-so-hard coffee drink and laughing out loud like there’s no tomorrow. Our crazy adventures collide, our thoughts go in parallel paths as we think alike. We even have thoughts on drinking beer or something hard but we don’t cause we just…don’t. It’s like a mutual understanding that we save those beer or liquor moments for that special day, where we are celebrating something big. And we don’t have to say anything about it cause we already know it by heart.

So…how are you? How’s life lately? How have you been treating your days when we weren’t together? I am sure that you are having your own best-day-of-your-life moments from time to time. And I also know that you’re dying to share them, so call me and I’ll be there to listen. I am excited!

Weekend Rambling

How are you guys doing lately? My heart’s been up and down, inhaling love, paint, and stress all at the same time but all is good. At least I got a day like today, to rest and do whatever.

But…here goes some rambling on my thoughts lately.

I’m thinking of going back to Zumba. I don’t know why. I know am fat and reducing through Zumba is great but I guess that isn’t my main purpose. I miss the thrill, the instructors kuya Marcus and Adrian. I miss the atmosphere, the sweat, the heat, the music, the moves, everything about it. I think I’ll visit them today.

There’s a mini event actually that will be held today. It’s a 4D Challenge in a coffee shop. Baguio Military Plamo Starters Club is the group that organized the event. Well, good luck to participants!

Oh oh! Leaving you guys with some photos that made my day so far…

the streets of Hawaii….

 

can’t wait to play cardfights! 

 

Weekend Coffee Share

 

If we were having coffee right now, I’d tell you that I am happy, overwhelmed, and confused. Life is great lately mainly because of the shock-surprise I got from Jam, IPMS Secretary. I’ll be doing something big soon. Yes, this something is big for me even though it would not mean that much for you. I’ll be doing a…nah, not now. Anyways. Aside from that, I have been writing drafts for the artist’s writeups which will be posted on Blissful Pages soon. What makes me happy is the overflowing of words inside me right now. My mind is going to explode soon so I have to finish and wrap things up with what the artists want me to write before I go haywire. Next week will be a very busy week for me. I’ll be working in the Baguio Country Club Library! Alone! Mostly alone. Ha ha. I honestly do not know if I can do this or not but hey, it’s worth a shot. Jam’s words are still in my mind…

 This is a break for you! We are just here to support you. I am here to make sure everything will succeed. 

Teary-eyed me. Yeah you can say it’s overreacting for me. But hey, this is the biggest thing ever! And what more, it’s what I was imagining like two months ago. I wanted to do something big but I don’t know how to start. And then I scribbled a project for the local artists that I am planning to make it my long-term goal and then I got sidetracked along the way. But it’s the same banana, bonita!

Everything is overwhelming that I got my week fully scheduled. Fully booked? Ha ha. Yeah. Meeting people here and there, getting ideas from left to right. Because next week, I won’t be publicly seen with anyone and I won’t be around asking for lunch buddies or joy companions. Ha ha.

Confusion. Quite confused with people lately. I guess being my true self even for a day is dangerous. I guess, bringing out the “me” of yesteryears is scary. Because of the good news, I suddenly had the courage to be myself (the real me) and then I regret it right on. Now, I guess I don’t have the strength to be anything anymore. Back to being the boring me as of the moment.

*paging amateurairplanes to contact me. hahaha. *